Remember Lot's wife...

StudiOBrien

Don't look back.

I'm beginning my new chapter on my journey. Today is my last day where I've worked for 9 years. I'm looking forward to this new leg of the journey on the path to holiness. I pray to not be tempted to long for a 'piddly paycheck' that I'm losing. I must follow this dream, and I pray that it's a dream that leads to a holy desire to hear and do God's will. To write as He leads, to touch even just ONE soul. To help point that soul toward the Light of the Beloved. I ask for your prayers. It's a time of transition. Time for us to not cling to 'anything' for security, except God. Pray for my husband as well. It's a bit harder for him to 'lose the paycheck' at this point, though it wasn't much, it was more than the nothing that will now be. But I don't see it as 'losing' or 'nothing'...I see it as a time for us to grow in faith, in trust, in hope, and to find that what is 'nothing' is really everything, when seen with eyes of faith.

I will also be helping my friend, Kris, at KVSS with some things that take up time, where some help would be welcomed. Uploading interviews, emails, phone calls, her blog, researching, etc. It will be as a volunteer. But as the station grows, who knows? Maybe there will be a paying position at some point down the line. If not, that's fine, too.

Please pray for me that I will mature in the faith, grow in holiness and that my writing gift, eventhough it is very small, will come to fruition in the form of a published book and touch one soul for the Kingdom of God, His Glory and help that one soul on his or her salvation journey. My hand is set on the plow. My fingers will be at the keyboard hopefully typing something that only God can say through me. I realize I'm not a "Flannery O'Connor" or a "Michael O'Brien" or anyone nearly as gifted and talented as they. However, there's a story inside me that is longing to break out and be told. It's there. It's waited for the right time and the right time has come.

As for Lot's wife and her "teachable moment" in history, I don't ever want to become a "pillar" of Morton Salt. I like salt, but only on buttered popcorn and sprinkled a bit on my dinner. If salt loses it's flavor, what good is it? I can't stay on at my paying job any longer. It would suck the flavor, the life out of me. It's time for "change I can believe in" but the change is brought to me by the Holy Spirit, and not 'mere man.' The change I believe in is the change from childishness into childlike adulthood. To be a 'child of God' in this adult body, to grow ever more young in His care and under His loving, tender, compassionate, gentle, firm, penetrating 'daddy-like' gaze. Time to step out of the boat of "comfort" and walk on the water toward Jesus. Looking down at times, flailing at times, but trusting He's there to pick me up. Dry me off. Dust me off. Tend my wounds. Looking back is what is most dangerous. Pressing on toward the "Goal"...the Sacred Heart of my Lord, Jesus Christ.